Monday, August 8, 2011



This is a lovely documentary about a cowboy named "Buck," who holds training clinics for horses and people with horses.  He "breaks" colts in a NICE, RESPECTFUL way, rather than being violent or using fear to get them to obey.  He is so connected with the horses.  The documentary is largely about Buck and his life, but there are also some heartbreaking horse stories.  I might have cried.

I highly recommend this movie.  Though I am vegan and have some opinions about "using" horses, Buck's story is an interesting and heartfelt one, and the film is just really well-made.


Sunday, August 7, 2011

Midnight In Paris

Starring: Owen Wilson, Rachel McAdams, Marion Cotillard
Directed/Written by: Woody Allen

I don't usually like Woody Allen all that much, but this was pretty cute.  It has a very clear message: everyone wishes they could live back in "the good old days."  It's great hipster commentary on blind nostalgia.  Owen Wilson is the perfect "Woody Allen."  A much BETTER Woody Allen, I think.  Rachel McAdams is a bitch, which I love.  It brings me back to her Mean Girls days.  Marion Cotillard is so gorgeous I want to cry.

All in all, a cute movie for literary types.  If you are annoyed by pretentious literary stuff, don't see it.



Starring: Kristen Wiig, Rose Byrne and Maya Rudolph

This movie is so freaking funny.  I saw it twice.  It's heartfelt, wonderfully cast, and has some of the funniest scenes I have ever seen.  The characters are very relatable, and although it seems like a chick flick, there's enough ridiculous raunch for dudes to love it, too.


African Cats


This is a Disney documentary about a family of cheetahs and a couple of lion prides.  It is narrated by Samuel L. Jackson, and I really wanted him to talk about "muthafucking African cats," but he didn't.  It's beautifully shot, but it's also really cheesy, manipulative, and anthropomorphic.  Please, don't speak for animals.  Just don't.

It's really amazing what high-tech cinematography can do these days, though!


Scream 4

Starring: Emma Roberts, Neve Campbell, Courtney Cox

I liked this so much!!!  I saw it twice.  It was so much fun, especially for movie-lovers.  There were great references to the original Scream Trilogy, which I love, and it was very self-reflexive about horror movie conventions.  This is exactly what you want in a teen horror flick.  Campy and scary and even downright funny!



Starring: Seth Rogan, Simon Pegg, Nick Frost
Directed by: Greg Mottola

I liked this more than most British-y Simon Pegg/Nick Frost movies, but it was really lackluster.  It was trying too hard to be sweet, and therefore failed, in my opinion, to be funny.


The Lincoln Lawyer

Starring: Matthew McConaughey, Ryan Phillipe, Marisa Tomei, William H. Macy

This movie was fine.  Pretty much like watching a movie version of Damages/Law and Order.  Interesting enough for TV, but not really movie-worthy.  And the fact that his office is his car has nothing to do with anything, except for giving a role to a kindly, young black man, who plays his driver.


Battle: Los Angeles

Starring: Aaron Eckhart and a bunch of other douchebags

This is one of the worst movies I've ever seen.  I have nothing positive to say about it.  Fucking OOO-RAH.


Cowboys Vs. Aliens

Starring: Daniel Craig, Olivia Wilde, Harrison Ford
Directed by: Jon Favreau
Written by: Roberto Orci and Alex Kurtzman

I did not have high hopes for this movie, given its name, but I was pleasantly surprised.  The first 45 minutes or so were really good at setting up the rest of the movie.  It really established a campy Western feel, and Daniel Craig was the perfect, rough-around-the-edges, lonely cowboy.  He's pretty damn rugged and sexy.

Unfortunately, the movie kind of lost me once the aliens came around.  I was much more interested in the relationships between the human characters than the battle to destroy the aliens.  It may have been because I was really tired, but I just kind of checked out.  The cast is great, though.  This is worth seeing if you want some action, sexy people, and witty Western stuff.  It's a pretty well-crafted movie.


Tuesday, August 2, 2011

Crazy, Stupid, Love.

Starring: Ryan Gosling, Emma Stone, Steve Carrell, Julianne Moore
Directed by: Glenn Ficarra, John Requa
Written by: Dan Fogelman

Despite the TERRIBLE title of this movie, I really enjoyed it.  It will be hard to talk about anything except how GODDAMNED SEXY Ryan Gosling is, but I shall try.  Some good things about this movie:

1. How GODDAMNED SEXY EVERYTHING ABOUT RYAN GOSLING IS.  My friends and I were literally moaning and "Oh my God-ing" through much of this movie.  His body.  His accent.  His clothes.  His face.  His swagger.  Oh God.  Oh God.  To just stand in the same room as him.  Oh God.

2. Steve Carrell has some serious acting chops!  He is so believable in this movie, and it was great to see him in a sometimes-serious role that had better dialogue than Dan In Real Life.  I think Steve Carrell is one of the few actors who can be adorably awkward-funny and really heartfelt-serious in the same movie, and it is totally acceptable (take that, Robin Williams!).

3. Emma Stone is really cute and funny and quirky.  She wasn't in the movie as much as the trailer made it seem, but she is still a very important vehicle for the plot twists and turns.  I don't know why most movies seem to try to make her out to be some sexy, gorgeous woman.  She's not.  She's the kind of girl you have a crush on, for sure.  Not the kind of girl a cocky, sexy dude crosses the bar to try to bed.  And, I MUCH prefer the former.

4. Julianne Moore, who usually bugs the hell out of me, was actually very sympathetic and subdued in this movie.  She didn't seem as "act-y" as usual, so good job, Julianne!

5. The costume design.  The clothes were very important in this movie, and whoever did the costume design had some serious fashion sense.  Especially for sexy menswear.  Oh GOD, RYAN GOSLING IN SUITS.

6. Ryan Gosling's perfect butt.

7. Unexpected events in a movie that seemed character-driven really made this a memorable film.

8. Smart, realistic characters.  Touching moments.

Do I have anything negative to say about this movie?  Sometimes I felt like it dragged a bit, but for the most part, I really recommend this, and was super-pleasantly surprised.


Friends With Benefits

Starring: Mila Kunis and Justin Timberlake
Directed by: Will Gluck
Written by: Keith Merryman

I figured this would be pretty bad because of the super-cliche plot, and the fact that Natalie Portman and Ashton Kutcher did a version of this film called "No Strings Attached" earlier this year.  Something makes me thing Mila and Natalie lost a bet on the set of Black Swan.  I didn't see No Strings Attached, but I'm sure it's a slightly less sexy version of Friends With Benefits.

There aren't many people I want to see have sex more than Justin Timberlake and Mila Kunis.  With the exception of Ryan Gosling, Justin Timberlake might be my biggest celebrity crush.  And certainly, though I am 95% heterosexual, I would gladly be in a threesome with Mila Kunis.  She is so adorable in Forgetting Sarah Marshall, and I just think she is so fun and gorgeous.

Despite the silly-yet-raunchy sex scenes, JT's beefy body, and Mila's gorgeous eyes, this movie was dreadful.  I think JT and Mila are some of the most naturally charming young actors in existence, yet this screenplay seemed to suck the life out of them.  This movie was filled with the trite-est of dialogue, and the "jokes" were "almost invisible grin" worthy at best.  Here are two things that really bugged me about the movie:

JT's character is from LA, and Mila lives in NYC.  She recruits him to be the new Art Director for GQ, so he moves to New York.  There are tons of super-cliche "New Yorkers walk fast" and "LA has bad traffic" jokes.  The jokes don't appeal to anyone.  They are too vague and obvious for those who live or have visited those cities, and too specific for those who haven't.  Seems like lazy writing to me.

I am also really tired of romantic comedies having characters who talk about romantic comedies.  You know, "It's never like it is in the movies!" etc etc.  There is even a fake rom-com that Mila's character loves that is so over-the-top (starring Jason Segal and Rashida Jones) that it would never get made.  Bad bad parodies.

I'm trying to decide if this movie was worth $10.50 to see JT humping and bumping with his perfect, naked ass.  Maybe.  But probably not.  More like...$6.  That seems a more appropriate of a price to watch a terrible movie with JT's naked ass.